How excited are you for your wedding day?

Can you not wait to start forever with your other half?

Definitely exciting times ahead for you and your partner!

But first, let's get down to business... You have a wedding to plan.

Now, even if you've hired the best wedding planner to get most of the workload done, you can't get rid of one task.

That's right, picking your groomsmen.

For some, this is as easy as '123'. For others, however, the task can be a stressful one. These grooms can't help scratching their heads and thinking, "how to pick groomsmen?"

We're here to help.

In this article, we'll give you all the ins and outs of picking your groomsmen. This way, it'll be a lot easier for you.

Of course, this isn't mandatory. The truth is, you can ask whoever you want to stand by you on your big day.

Plus, we'll also answer some of the most frequently asked questions about groomsmen.  

So are you ready? Let's begin!

What Do Groomsmen Do?

Before you start picking names from your list, it's helpful to know the groomsmen requirements.

What do groomsmen do?

To be sure, they do more than just stand and look good.

These guys (or girls) are your moral support. They're the ones who listen to you when you feel nervous, go with you to pre-wedding events, organize your bachelor party, help you look your best at the wedding, give you groomsmen gifts, etc…

Want a complete list of the groomsmen’s tasks? Check it out here.

Once you know their responsibility, you'll want to make sure you pick the guys that you trust, love to hang out with, and rely on.

Check out this video explaining the groomsmen’s roles:

How Do I Choose A Groomsman?

Now that we've got that out of the way, it's time to answer the question:

How do I choose a groomsman?

As we said earlier, there are no rules. You can choose whomever you want.

That said, you might want some tips to help you out.

Well, we've got 4 useful tips for you...

1. Consider Your Siblings

Some of the closest people we can have in our lives are our siblings. I mean, they're the ones we grew up with.

If you have a strong relationship with your siblings, then they're the perfect candidates as groomsmen (or hey, it can be groomsladies, too).

We know that the wedding is about you and your bride, but family is a huge part of it as well. So including your siblings in your entourage is a great idea.

Now, you might ask, "does my brother have to be a groomsman?"

Of course not!

However, if you're close to him and can trust him, then why not, right? It'll be one of the biggest honors for him to stand by you.

2. You Also Have Your Relatives

Weddings are a great time to celebrate your love with the whole fam!

If you have a big family, then why not invite some of your closest relatives (say, your cousins) to be your groomsmen?

We're almost certain they'll be delighted to help you out before, during, and even after the wedding.

Always have your family in mind first and foremost when choosing your groomsmen.

3. Don’t Forget Your Bride’s Family!

As you and your bride become one, her family becomes your family.

And what better way to welcome them in by asking them to be part of your entourage.

Should the bride's brother be a groomsman?

Not necessarily. But again, if you're close and you want to share that moment with him, then why not? He's going to be part of your family very soon anyway.

4. Best Friends Are A Great Pick

Of course, it's not all about the family. What about your closest friends?  

Pick the friends in your life that you know you can rely on. The ones that pick up right away when you call them, the ones that have been with you through thick and thin, the ones that want your big day to be the best it can be...

If you have friends like these, then adding them to your groomsmen list shows how much they mean to you.

How to Narrow Down Groomsmen?

So you've listed all the potentials down - siblings, relatives, best friends...

But there's a problem.

There are too many names on your list. You'll have to narrow it down.

That's not a pleasant task, especially if you don't want anyone to feel left out.   

Good news! We've got tips for narrowing the list as well. (Again, these are simply tips to help you, not rules you must follow.)

Here they are...

1. Keep It Simple

Don't want anyone feeling left out? Keep it simple.

What we mean by that is have a limited number of groomsmen, say, two to four.

This way, you'll only have to pick the ones that are closest to your heart.

I mean, if you have, say, six or ten groomsmen, you might have to reach out to your other friends. And some of the other friends that you didn't reach out to will feel bad about it.

Do you see what we mean?

So it's actually easier when your groomsmen are less.

2. Don’t Base It On A Number

It's always nice to have a uniform wedding party, with the same number of bridesmaids and groomsmen.

However, it's not wise to force the issue.

Let's give you an example.

The bride picks out five bridesmaids, but you only have three close guys that you want as your groomsmen. It's better to stick to what you're comfortable with instead of trying to find two more guys to fill the spots.

Don't base your groomsmen by a number but by how close they are to you.

3. Put Your Focus on Reliability

If you simply can't narrow down your groomsmen list, one thing you can do is put all the focus on reliability.

Remember, your groomsmen are your moral supporters and helpers. This means they have to be reliable.

They have to be reliable to pick up when you call. They have to be reliable in organizing your bachelor party. They have to be reliable in arriving early to all the pre-wedding events.

Naming only the most reliable ones on your list will certainly narrow it down.

Frequently Asked Questions

Okay, let's now answer some of the most frequently asked questions about groomsmen.

When Should I Pick My Groomsmen?

As soon as possible.

A good estimate is 9 or 10 months before the wedding.

It needs to be THAT early so they can prepare, too. Get plane tickets, reschedule activities, file a leave at work, etc...

Also, in case someone isn't able to accept your invitation, you'll have a lot of time to replace him.

How Many Groomsmen Should I Have? 

You decide!

There's no rule on how many groomsmen you should have by your side. You don't even need to have one at all if you don't want to.

Who Is Included in the Groomsmen?

Again, that's your decision.

However, the most common groomsmen are siblings, relatives, part of the bride's family, and closest friends.


To summarize, here are our tips on choosing your groomsmen:

  • Always consider your siblings first. They are the ones who know you through and through.
  • Up next is relatives. It's always so special to share your wedding day with your family.
  • Don't leave out your new family - the bride's family. It'll be a great way to welcome them in.
  • Choose among your closest friends. They are going to feel honored to be asked to stand by your side on your BIG day.

To narrow down the list of names, follow these tips:

  • Keep it simple. Pick only the closest of the close.
  • Don't base it on a number. Pick the guys that you feel comfortable with and don't be pressured into adding more.
  • Focus on reliability. Make sure your groomsmen are the most reliable ones.

How to pick groomsmen?

There's no right answer. But with these tips, you'll have a much easier time.

Have questions? Ask us down below!